The Baby Sleep Struggle (You’re Not Alone)
If you have kids, you’ve most likely wondered how to get your baby to fall – and stay -
asleep. Just when you think you’ve gotten them down for a nap and start dreaming of that hot cup of coffee with your feet high, they wake up and you have to start all over again. We’ve all been there and as a mom of three, I’ve gathered some science-backed advice over the years.
In this article we will go through tips and tricks that can help babies with that ever-challenging sleep, from newborn sleep, to sleeping through the night and how to help a baby with colic.
Sleep for both mom and baby
To assist our babies in the (sometimes) difficult task of falling asleep, we must first understand the concept of sleep. This type of information has historically been passed down from family to family, but as we all know, the village we moms once had is no longer the same. Our new “village” of information is now the big world wide web and artificial intelligence, and it might be difficult to know who to trust in the noise of everyone telling you what to do.
Understanding Baby Sleep
Sleep is one of the most important things we do as humans, but the sleeping pattern of a newborn differs drastically from that of an adult, even from that of a 1-month-old. Babies are constantly developing and what worked last week no longer works today. But there are some initial guidelines to follow:
Guidelines for understanding baby sleep
- 0 – 3 months: When newborn, and in the first few months of life, it is all about watching out for your baby’s sleep cues. Rubbing eyes, zoning out, yawning and turning away from stimulation are all signs that your newborn needs a nap.
- 3 – 6 months: Many babies start doing well with routines, while still adjusting based on cues and how the day is going.
- 6 + months: By this age, many babies will have a steadier rhythm, and set times help with bedtime and less overtired evenings.
Sleep is one of the most important factors when it comes to our health, so it is worth your time.
Our tips for making your baby go to sleep
Through the years, we have had a lot of experience helping babies fall asleep. Personally, I’ve had three completely different experiences with my kids, but I’ve been fortunate enough to not have a baby with colic. But we have talked to a lot of moms who have, and there is some advice that keeps recurring. We’ll share our best tips with your depending on the issue you might be facing.
- Making your baby fall asleep faster
- Making your baby sleep through the night
- Making a colic baby fall asleep
- Making your baby fall asleep in a basinet
- Making a month-old baby fall asleep
How to Make Your Baby Sleep Faster
When newborn, your baby will not know the difference between day and night. So, in the beginning, you just have to roll with it. But at around 3-4 months your little one will start producing their own melatonin, a natural hormone for regulating sleep. And this is the perfect time for establishing healthy sleep routines.
Establish a consistent bedtime routine
From around three months you should establish a consistent 20-30 minute, calming bed routine. By going through the same exact routine every night, you will signal “sleep time”, and it teaches your baby what to expect, helping them relax faster. Sticking to the same time schedule helps develop their circadian rhythm, telling your baby when to sleep and when to stay awake.
Use motion for those daytime naps
During daytime naps, anything goes. Most of the successful strategies for daytime naps include motion. Rocking in your arms, bouncing on a yoga ball, doing squats going for a stroll - it all mimics the motion in the womb, helping your little one relax and fall asleep faster. Did you know that studies published in Current Biology show that being rocked while you sleep leads to higher quality sleep? So, no need to feel bad about helping your little one drift off. It is basic biology.
Also read: Does rocking your baby to sleep help?
Making Your Baby Sleep Through the Night
One of the biggest questions all parents of small children have is usually how to make your baby sleep through the night. Some kids are “good” sleepers from the start, while others need more assistance and routines to sleep through the night. From 3-4 months, a consistent 20–30-minute calming sleep routine will help your baby understand that this sleep is different from those shorter daytime naps. Calming activities, like a bath, a book and a goodnight song at the same time and in the same order every evening will help your little one prepare for what is coming.
Make sure the sleep environment is dark and cool (68 – 72 °F). Feel free to help make your baby sleepy by rocking in your arms but make sure to put him down before he is asleep, as this will make it easier for them to settle back to sleep when transitioning from one sleep cycle to another. And if, or should I say when, your little one wakes up, keep it dark and calm while using either milk or motion to help them back to sleep.
One a sidenote, “sleeping through the night” is usually defined as 5-6 hours of continuous sleep. So, it might be a while before your little one will clock in that 7 to 7 night we all dream of.
How to Help a Baby with Colic to Sleep – The 5 S’s Method
Does your baby have colic? I’m so sorry – colic is so exhausting. It takes the difficulties of baby sleeping to a whole new level. We do not fully know why some babies get colic, but several factors contribute, including immature digestive systems, sensitivity to stimuli and environmental stressors. But there is some advice that might aid at least a little, like the 5 S’s method:
1. Swing/rock
The American Academy of Pediatrics notes that gently rocking your baby or using steady rhythmic motion may help soothe a fussy or colicky infant and encourage sleep.
2. Side/stomach hold (only while awake in your arms)
Holding your baby on their left side or stomach while awake in your arms and gently rubbing their back can be a helpful way to soothe fussiness and support digestion in colicky infants — as long as it’s done safely and the baby is supervised at all times.
3. Shush/white noise
Steady, calming sounds such as white noise can help soothe a fussy or colicky baby by creating a womb-like auditory environment that promotes relaxation and supports sleep.
4. Suck (boob or pacifier)
Sucking, whether on the breast or a pacifier, activates a calming reflex and can help settle a fussy or colicky baby. The American Academy of Pediatrics notes that offering a pacifier is a safe and effective way to soothe and reduce crying in infants.
5. Swaddle (always follow safe sleep guidelines)
Wrapping your baby snugly in a light blanket can help them feel secure and reduce fussiness by mimicking the snug environment of the womb — but make sure to use safe swaddling techniques and always place your baby on their back for sleep.
Personally, I would also add a 6th and 7th S:
6. Skin-to-skin
The best way to regulate a baby’s nervous system is to have them align with ours. It lowers stress hormones, stabilizes breathing and heart rate, keeps baby warm, improves digestion and boosts bonding.
7. Space
Having a baby with colic is extreme sport. Trying to comfort an inconsolable baby takes an unimaginable toll on a person. Take shifts (if possible), use noise-cancelling headphones, and if you feel overwhelmed – put baby down safely in a crib.
If you suspect your baby has colic, we highly advise seeing your primary care provider to rule out allergies and other health related issues that can mimic colic.
How Can You Help Your Baby to Sleep in a Bassinet?
It is an indescribable feeling to have a tiny human fall asleep on you. And if you are comfortable with contact naps, keep going! Just make sure to follow safe sleep guidelines. But if you need some time to yourself and want your little one to fall asleep in the bassinet, there is hope.
There are two ways to facilitate naps in the bassinet. Either you use the “drowsy but awake” approach, like you would do for nighttime sleep, or you can rock your little one to sleep and then transfer. But how to transfer without the little one waking up?
- Hold your baby close to your chest when lowering them into the bassinet
- Put feet/but down first and then slowly let the rest of the body follow
- Put your hand on the baby’s chest for 10-20 seconds after putting them down.
- Using a white noise or shushing can help with transitioning from being held to bassinet.
If your baby still wakes up when being put down after following the above steps, I can recommend holding your little one for around 10 minutes to make sure they are heading towards deep sleep.
Tips for 1-Month-Old Babies
At one month old, babies don’t really follow a true day-night rhythm yet. Their sleep is more driven by hunger and comfort than the clock. So how to make a 1 month baby sleep at night?
They usually sleep for anything between 14 and 17 hours in a day and sleep is light and easily disrupted. But many new parents make the mistake of thinking their little one is awake after a short 20–30-minute nap, while they are actually just transitioning from one sleep-cycle to another. It is completely normal for them to make noise and have their eyes open, but they are actually still sleeping. So, if you think your little one is a wake, give them a few minutes to see if they might just be connecting sleep-cycles.
But at the end of the day, we all just have to face the fact that your one-month-old sets the sleep schedule and you just have to do your best to follow – even if it means sleeping during the day and staying awake at night.
Devices and Tools to Help Baby Sleep
Though history there has been between five and ten caregivers per baby, but in our time that ratio is down to one or two caregivers per baby. This has drastically changed the way moms are able to not only look after their little ones but also themselves. Luckily, there are devices out there that can aid. Not as a replacement for you, but as an assistant.
One product category that can really aid in many of the situations discussed earlier is a stroller rocker. It is a neat little device that attaches to the stroller, bedside or crib and gently rocks it, giving your baby that needed movement.
In our home, the Sleepytroll Baby Rocker has been a lifesaver, especially with my youngest. Having a device rocking my baby to sleep and keep her sleeping has kept me from losing my sanity. Eating, having a hot cup of coffee or just putting my feet up for a few minutes helps me recharge so that I am 100% present when my baby is awake. Some say it’s for lazy moms, I say it’s for smart moms and tried babies.
Check out Sleepytroll Baby Rocker here.
When Should You See a Healthcare Provider
Sleep is important, but so is safety. Always lay your little one down on their back on a firm, flat mattress, with no loose bedding, pillows or toys in the sleeping area. Make sure the room is smoke-free and comfortably cool.
Challenges with sleep are very common for babies, but contact a healthcare provider if your baby has:
- Persistent trouble sleeping despite consistent routines
- Shows signs of pain, reflux or difficulty breathing during sleep
- Snores loudly, gasps for air or pauses breathing during sleep
- Has difficulties gaining weight or feeing issues linked to sleep problems
With our babies, it is better to ask too much than too little. They are the most important things we have.
Some takeaways on helping your baby sleep better
Helping your baby fall asleep — and stay asleep — can feel like one of the hardest parts of early parenthood. The good news is that baby sleep can get easier with time, consistency, and a few science-backed strategies. By learning your baby’s sleep cues, building a calming bedtime routine, and creating a soothing sleep environment, you can support better sleep both during naps and at night.
For many babies, gentle motion is especially effective — whether it’s rocking in your arms, going for a walk, or using a helpful tool like the Sleepytroll Baby Rocker to keep the stroller, bassinet, or crib moving when you need a break. If your baby struggles with colic, techniques like the 5 S’s method (and extra support for you as a parent) can make a big difference on the toughest days.
Most importantly, remember that every baby is different, and sleep development isn’t linear. Trust your instincts, do what works for your family, and don’t hesitate to reach out to a healthcare provider if something feels off. Better sleep is possible — for your baby and for you.
Scources & further reading